On Tuesday evening I continuously read a novel book from 7 pm
and stopped at page 74; I felt tired and lay on my bed. The light was black due
to power cut; I struggled to get my cell phone and peek it with one eye open as
the light flashed too much that my eyes couldn’t bear it. It’s 9:30 pm. I felt
asleep in a while.
The next day I woke up at 6 am, after my morning prayers from
6:30am to 6 pm in the evening I finished reading the novel book, with
breakfast, lunch and light snacks in between. I sigh a relief of winning the
battle with the book and I laid on my bed as since early morning till late noon
I read continuously so I had a backache, I turned on the song from my cell
phone from an old movie of Salman Khan.
Then I thought, how did the writer wrote all those and how
many days it took for him to complete typing that long 267 pages story on his
computer? How he arranged all the sequences and how he chose the words to
describe them all? I kept thinking all those for 4 minutes until the song
stopped then.
Then again I played another song and this time it was of Guns
N Roses” November rain” and I started thinking, how he may have had approached
the publisher? May he have gone through rejection like I am going through to
publish my novel book? How did the publisher behaved with him, when he said I
want to publish a book, handing him the manuscript in his hands? Had the
publisher flipped the pages and later said to him like they said to me that
with a fake courtesy smile saying, now the market of book is down, so our team
has other priority to look first?
Had they took his manuscript like mine for quite couple of
weeks assuring they will go through it and will reply soon within 3, 4 days and
never calling back and like me, did he call them to get a positive reply,
praying to god wholeheartedly to get to listen a positive yes “ yeah, we are interested, your book is really
good, our team liked your writing and also they hoped that the readers out
there will like it too and will be a bestselling book, so we want you to come
to the office to sign some documents, so
please come soon in the afternoon” but getting an exact opposite response
saying” we are sorry, we only publish
philosophical books, it’s our theme, so we can’t go against our rules, so
better you try other publishing houses.”
Had he gone through like me to the publisher, who said at
first that “we are sorry; we only publish Nepali books and later after 2
minutes saying yes but asking to make an investment of more than 100 thousand
rupees? And had he gone through like me positioning the face down, thinking how
shall he get the investment as his parents doesn’t show any interest in his
works and also knowing the parents problem that his father can’t arrange a huge
sum of money for his son’s book to publish as he have to look for his family as
he has some earning of Rs 16000 a month.
Had he cried like me alone, sometimes going at the café and
asking for a cigarette and later the shopkeeper handing chewing gum instead of
returning the remaining money. Had he kept quite like me, despite of wanting to
blow his fist at the shopkeeper’s face of not returning the money and giving
the chewing gum instead. Had he calmed down like me without arguing with the
shopkeeper and taking what he returned and went silently to the table smoking cigarette
getting lost in thinking how shall he publish his book and who in the earth
shall help him to publish his book?
These are the pains that a new writer especially who doesn’t
have any close link to the publishing industry and especially of the one who
are economically weak but having a passion to write goes through, like me.
Sometimes, I think of why I am not born in the families of
the rich people as with all those qualities and talents god has instilled on me
my rich dad and mom would invest all those money at-least for a sake of having
a son to look after as they have given birth without my permission. I would
have become a sort of celebrity writer, if not that, then a mere writer.
However I console
myself saying that if I was born in that rich kind of family then I wouldn’t
have to work like I am doing now and then I wouldn’t have to experience all
those sufferings and also I couldn’t write like what I am writing now and my
writing couldn’t be good enough as I am writing it through all my emotions and
with a true heart and tears filled eyes..
Despite all these, I thank my god for everything that he has
given me, I thank most all the circumstances for giving me a passion to write
and letting my inner thoughts to share with you.
Though most of my inner voice, I couldn’t share as it doesn’t
get published and I have to fight strong standing and controlling my
frustrations and depressions to burst out from becoming paralyzed not letting
me to write next time collapsing all the writing skills and desires.
I don’t have power to go and shout at the editor or to the
publication houses saying why you didn’t publish my book and articles.
With every rejection, these days, I’ve become what I am now.
I am strong but I’ve a soft heart. My heart gets hurt and brain gets into
accident, with all those pain my eyes drops the tears, however after some
consoling lubricating treatment and pampering gifts to my heart, it gets
normal.
I have never loosed hope and I’ll never stop writing. I am
born to write and I’ll keep on writing. No-matter how much rejection I get, I
know those rejection will hit me strong to help me become one of the
bestselling and loved writer in the entire world, sooner or later and even when
I die, my work will make history like the writing of Khaled Hossieni, J.K
Rowling, Nicolas Sparks, Paulo Coelho and will be eternal until one day world
comes to an end.
Writing will be part of me forever.
Name: Moin
Uddin
Address:
Ghattekulo, Kathmandu, Nepal
Email:
moinuddin_200000@yahoo.com
Phone:
00977-9841689437
Short Bio: I am a post Graduate
student of Masters in Business Studies "MBS” studying at Shankhar Dev
Campus, Putalisadak and currently, I work in Kathmandu National Medical College
as a Computer operator. I have a passion to write and I’ve written a Novel
book, and I am looking for a publisher to publish my book.
